October 24, 2012

October 23, 2017

I sat down with one of my best friends for dinner the other night after attending a campus event held my another sorority. I had sat through that event and thought about how as a senior this was one of the last events like this I would be attending as a collegiate member of AOII. I thought about how my kids could one day be sitting through this event or one like it, thinking ” Dear God College is a Weird Place.” I guess these are the things I think about now because I am getting closer to actual adulthood and the “real world.”

I sat there, as I ate wings and fried pickles, my friend asked me if I ever thought about how incredibly different life was now compared to less than a year ago. To be truthful I hadn’t, well not really that I hadn’t thought about it but rather that I hadn’t noticed. The changes that had come about in the last year had been gradual more like a transition than a change. But here I was a year later sitting in a Wild Wing Cafe (where I now work) eating wings after attending a Breast Cancer Benefit Pageant with someone, who a year ago I was just getting reacquainted with since High School. We sat and talked about how things were not how they used to be but both agreed that it was for the better.

This semester has been particularly rough for me and I haven’t had time to think in general let alone about the past. In fact, all I could think about was my future. I’m set to graduate in the spring and do an intership in the summer but my classes got messed up due to an advising appointment gone wrong and I has been a back and forth for a total of 9 weeks before I finally got some help to fix it. The entire ordeal was exhausting and emotional but the entire time the one thing that was constant besides my friends has been Hamp. I had and still have so much uncertainty about where the next year is going to take me but some how Hamp is the one person that keeps me from losing it most days.

I realized I have a totally different friend group than I did a year ago, even from two years ago, and high school. The one thing in my life that has been constant through everything good and bad was Hamp. Tomorrow will be 5 years since Hamp and I started dating and we have known each other even longer. He has always been there for me no matter what. When I was little I hated change, I was afraid of it. I never wanted anything to change and had a hard time when it did. Since Hamp came into my life almost everything has changed around me, my surroundings, the people I am with even my ability to trust people. I live in a one bedroom apartment and I love it. I never would have dreamed that this would be me if you asked me 5 years ago. I have come along way from the shy, awkward, high school freshman and even father since becoming a college freshman. Through all of this though the one constant has been Hamp. I have known for years that he was the person I am meant to be with. He is my best friend in the whole world, and I sometimes can’t believe that he even puts up with me. Sometimes I can’t even deal with me. But he knows me, and in the past 5 years has come to know me better than I know myself.

I have shared the past 5 years of my life and all its changes and ups and downs with one person who only seems to love me more because I am flawed and insecure and a mess most of the time. My worst fear has always been change and that is the one thing I have had the most of in my life but I think that Hamp came into my life to be a constant for each other in the middle of the uncertainty that life comes with. God never gives you more than you can handle and I think he gave me something to hold on to when things fall apart or fall into place.

So in the summer I will begin a big girl intership somewhere in the real world but I am okay because on October 24, 2012 I found my constant in life and my best friend or rather he found me. I can’t wait to see how our life changes in the next 5 years.

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